Problem-led leadership or leaders who do not aspire to be leaders but to inspire others through their enthusiasm to solve a problem. Sounds fitting for HSS/HSPs especially! Traditional leadership is less interesting for many of us as it is an always-on role. Many more growth-oriented HSS/HSPs and HSPs may prefer to view their “leadership” contribution as temporary and situation-dependent rather than the full-time stress and responsibility that burns people out, as we all know too well…
“What does it mean to be lonely? How do we live, if we’re not intimately engaged with another human being? How do we connect with other people, particularly if we don’t find speaking easy? And is technology helping with these things? Does it draw us closer together, or trap us behind screens?”
Critical thinking – a perennial topic in dire need of much love in our world. The good news? Critical thinking is a SKILL that anyone can learn, if they are willing to do a few things throughout life:
– invest the time to learn how to think critically and creatively (foundation for critical thinking is a great resource!) – be aware of the human tendency to engage in quick, easy, yet faulty thinking (and be willing to self-correct as needed) – hone critical thinking skills through practice, practice, practice…
Building emotional intelligence in our workforce and leadership requires not only self, social, and self-management dimensions but an entire skill set on relationship management.
Focusing on just the other three does not yield better leadership, does not serve to develop and grow the capacities and potential of others, does not make you a good collaborator, communicator, conflicter, change catalyst, or allow you to influence others in positive ways.
Navigating complex interpersonal relationships, especially work relationships, are inherently more difficult than personal relationships because employees and others are vested in an agenda based on need, their need to remain employed.
Leaders who are high in sensory intelligence, (highly sensitive persons if you prefer), if they wish to be effective and enact real change, must become quite knowledgeable and skilled in a sophisticated, flexible, and nuanced application of relationship building, cultivation, and management across a wide range of people who are all at differing levels of skill, experience, and complexity of development and growth.
It is NOT enough to simply say “Okay, I’m a highly sensitive person,” and expect for the rest to somehow work itself out. One must intentionally learn, develop, and continue refining the skills of effective relationship management, over a lifetime. Being effective as a communicator, collaborator, and decision-maker asks of us that we develop some fairly advanced abilities to navigate the complex world of interpersonal relationships.
Are you spending enough time and effort on building out your relationship management skills?
Let’s listen to the new song entitled “Make It Right” by Luke Goss, our friend, fellow highly sensitive man and incredible actor, artist, musician, and passionate advocate for building and holding space for community so all may feel loved, valued, and be seen and heard. This song is about always having the chance to improve and make things better as long as we’re alive:
What are your preconceived notions about leaders? Do they block you from relating to leadership as more than a drive to achieve goals at ALL costs? Perhaps “quiet leadership” may feel more familiar and inviting for you if you value the people who work for and with you more, while providing them with opportunities for growth and development.
Empowering the Sensitive Male Soul is the third book that seemed apparent to me as much-needed in the world. I was, of course, aware of other books on sensory processing sensitivity in men but felt they spoke to men in a way that did not necessarily represent my lived experiences and, I intuited, the same for many other men.
I wrote this book from the mind AND heart, trusting that it could stand as a resource to help people come to an accurate and appreciative stance on what it might mean to be men high in sensory intelligence, or, if you prefer, ‘highly sensitive.”
Even now, in 2022, two years after the book’s release and I am co-creating an entire documentary film on the same topic (see The Genius of Sensitivity: Redefining Masculinity) with Will Harper, director of Sensitive-The Untold Story, the chapters in Empowering the Sensitive Male Soul feel as well-chosen and relevant as ever!
DEPTH of processing (pattern recognition, associations with previous memories, what we know of the world, etc..), a HEART for service to our fellow human beings, and a MIND capable of rational, critical and creative thinking…
High sensory intelligence, aka, highly sensitive person, doesn’t mean you are gifted or smarter than others, it simply implies that you use the sensory information that you take in through your senses, process that information thoroughly, and use it strategically to engage with the world.
One example might be how we show up as ‘real’ people, as in the photo accompanying the attached post. Are we, as men, able to provide comfort, empathy, and/or compassion to those around who are in desperate need and do so without concerning ourselves with what ‘manly men’ do? Of course! Being a ‘man,’ beyond the cartoon he-man, ultra aggressive cliche we have been portrayed as, is about being secure in ourselves as human beings and willing to give of ourselves as parents, partners, sons, and leaders!!
Guys, however you feel about men and Sensory Processing Sensitivity, this world NEEDS us to be healers, leaders, teachers, and whole human beings who have the wisdom and courage to be more than one dimensional men led entirely by arbitrarily derived notions of what men ‘should’ be.
The Genius of Sensitivity film invites us to consider, through the candid stories told by men themselves, the possibility that men, just maybe, might also be ‘highly sensitive,’ high in sensory intelligence, or, if you prefer, simply men with the genetic trait Sensory Processing Sensitivity. Is it incredibly farfetched and counterintuitive to challenge the status quo thinking of men as incapable of real depth, feeling, or emotion? Not at all…
What role/s can these men who are half of the 20% of the world’s population with Sensory Processing Sensitivity play in bridging the gap? We’ll need to see The Genius of Sensitivity: Redefining Masculinity become a reality in its fullness to find out…
If you support this mission of raising consciousness around Sensory Processing Sensitivity in men, communicating it as a strength and a necessary component to a healthy and balanced planet, I urge you to help us in any you are able whether that means a donation, a connection, or simply sharing our posts, it all helps so much!
Think about all of the schlock films that are made each year and the hundreds of millions of dollars spent on entertainment that does nothing to advance mission critical issues like providing a timeless resource men may find and use as a portal through which they may pass on their way to allowing and accepting sensitivity within themselves as a strength and asset to themselves and to the world. Just a tiny fraction of the average mass market film budget would allow The Genius of Sensitivity: Redefining Masculinity to be made, marketed and distributed, and to live out in the public sphere as Sensitive-The Untold Story has now since 2015!
Donation link: (ALL donations go directly to the ongoing production of The Genius of Sensitivity: Redefining Masculinity)